Monday, August 11, 2014

There is NO shidduch crisis - a look at shidduchim on TU B'Av 5774.

Tu Bav the day that chazal say There were no better (i.e. happier) days for the people of Israel than the Fifteenth of Av and Yom Kippur, since on these days the daughters of Israel/Yerushalayim go out dressed in white and dance in the vineyards. What were they saying: Young man, consider whom you choose (to be your wife)? (Ta'anis, Chapter 4) It served as a matchmaking day for unmarried women during the time of the second bais hamikdosh. 
Read Full text Mishpacha magazine article HERE

Mishpacha magazine shidduch stat
Fast forward to Tu Bav 5774/2014  Mishpacha magazine in a article reaches out to noted askan and philanthropist, Reb Shlomo Yehuda rechnitz. In a rare interview Mr. Rechnitz shares the shocking pain and statistics of unmarried  bnos yisrael of  marriageable age. A crisis, he says is short lived, it is a problematic situation that needs a solution. Here with shidduchim  we are experiencing a catastrophe! Who can describe the pain and anguish that bnos yisrael are going through every day? right in front of our eyes, every day more bnos yisrael become destined to remain single. A stat shows the numbers of unmarried bais yaakov alumnae from a major American city graduating years 2000-2012 ranging from ages 20-31 there are 375 girls out of 1128 that are not married yet. 


Some say that hashem will take care of it we shouldn't mix in he is the mazaveg zivugim. But, Perhaps hashem has endured that the solutions exist, thats why, explains Reb shlomo yehuda the shidduch crisis does not exist among the chasidim or charedim in eretz yisrael. The ones who have the crisis is the American Yeshiva world. We have created a problem for ourselves by  the age gap differential of boys to girls. Since girls look for boys in an age gap several years older than them there will not be enough candidates to meet their need. The solution is to close the age gap by having Boys and girls seek spouses of the same age.The article goes on to give practical solutions by closing the gap. Having boys start shidduchim earlier, shortening the time learning before marriage and deferring it to after the chasunah. Have boys go to learn in Eretz yisrael at a younger age thus entering the market at a younger age or not going at all to learn in EY until after the chasunah. Mr. Rechnitz established  different funds offering financial incentives to help ease the financial burden in bringing about a shidduch. As an example he is offering  to supplement the shadchanus of any shadchan succesful in marrying off a girl age 25 or older to a boy her age or younger so they recieve total compensation up to $10,000. May we be zoche to the simcha of TU B"av and but this crisis or catastrophe behind us.

3 comments:

  1. I wonder if they also sis a study of the 75. that married, how many are still married. May as well get statistics for all crises at once.

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  2. Amazing man amazing article

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  3. Its a shame he chose mishpacha the anti-Torah rag.

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